Ring Tones
by C0rnBread
Summary: One, Harry goes koo-koo. Now, who is the next victim? Read to find out and Review to choose whose next! Oh the Madess! PG for mild violence.
1. Default Chapter

**AN:** Okay, i was jsut listening to the Television while reading some fanfic when that damned Mazda comercial with the ring tones?? Well this is harry eating breakfast while Uncle Vernon and DUdley are watching the TV.. and can anyone guess waht comcericail comes on?

here we go!!!

**Ring Tones**

Number four privet drive was slowly wakening on a beautiful day in june. Dudley, Harry Potter's whale of a cousin, had been up att night. Resently the Dursley family had gotten international dish tv, which ment that they got ALL the television channels in the world. Now, Dudley being the TV freak he is, we was staying up for all hours of the day and night watching it.

Sleepily, Harry stumbled downt he stairs and into the kitchen, where his cousin and large uncle were watching the dreaded machine. The two Dursley men had found a fasination with American televsion, so they were constantly watching it. Harry, had become so annoyed of teh thing, he started dreaming of ways to smash it to pieces. Even at teh daring thought of it, he broke out into an evil grin.Which his aunt sent odd looks to him.

Aunt Petuna walked intot he kitchen, and turned the television off. Dudley let out a whine, and Uncle VErnon, stood up.

"Whats the meaning of this?" He asid, turning a bit purple in teh face.

"You watch too much television!" she said, "We are going out today, so i suggest your get presentable!" she snapped and walked out of the kitchen again. Harry was atounded by his aunt. She had never done anything liekt that before. Uncle Verenon, however, turned the tv back on.

The Mazda car comercial came on. The ring tones of cell phones ringing in the Mazda words, 'Zoom zoom'. ANyone who had listened to that comcerial over many times would no dought, go crazy. ANd this exact comercial was the soul reason why Harry wanted to smash the tv into many many little bits. Harry watched the tv intently, planning his attack on it.

----

Harry's aunt soon after rushed everyone out of the house, witht he exception of Harry, of course. His aunt had giving him a long list of shores to do while they were away. Harry, being used to all of it, breezed through them all within the first hour they were gone. He then turned his darkened gaze on to the tv, while was by accident left on.

The Mazda comercial was playing again, which made Harry's insane liek smile grow bigger. He stumbled through the shed int he back yard looking for one of Dudleys old baseball bats. It took difficulty, seeing as the sports stuff was hidden in the very back, but he found it non the less. He got out the metal one and pulled out a carving knife he found when he first entered his room, or Dudleys second bedroom.

Looking at the metal bat he thought of a name for it, "Tiffany". 'Perfect, my love.. soon you and i will rule the world!!' Harry thought, and cackled evilly as he carved the name into the metal bat. This was his Tiffany, and together, they would conqur the evil televison, and the ringing tones of 'zoom zoom'. Once he finished he scratched off the label off of it.

They snuck into the house, Harry grinning insanely, with an odd look in his emerald eyes. He looked as if he werent there, emptyness, insane emptyness filled his eyes. HE was lightly swinging the bat into his hand as she stood infront of the TV, which was again playing the Mazda ring tone comercial. The TV kept repeating it over and over again. Harry raised Tiffany above his head and slammed her down, onto the televison. Glass went flying everywhere, but he didnt noticed. Again and again he slammed the bat down ontot eh television. Beating it to a crumpled heap.

Harry's breathing was heavy as he he looked at the broken televison. But there was one problem that remained, he could still hear it. So, he marched off to teh livign room, and he could hear the comercial coming from the speakers, though there was no picture. He slammed Tiffany down again, smahing the other televison to anopther crumpled heap. THe ringing tones were still there.

Harry made his way throght hte house, smashing every television, and radio. He smiled insanely still, his grin growing wider by the second. He smashed everything insight. He laughed as he did it. FInally the ring tones stoped, and he didnt hear the comercial anymore. He regained clear vision, and looked around the house.. He did smash EVERYTHING. He heard a car pulling intot he drive way, and paled instantly. The Dursleys were back, and he had ruined everything in their home. He wouldnt have time to clean everything up, and fix everything. They were going ot oskin him alive for sure... Harry stood in the hall way, watching the door. He was he nob turn and he blacked out...

----

Harry sat straight up in his bed. He had sweat rolling down the side of his face, and was breathing heavily. Look looked around his room, and saw that everything was in total darkness. He stood up and wlaked out of his room and down the hall way. Everything looked just fine. He went down the stairs, and saw that everything was as normal. Nothing smashed to pieces, everything in their rightful places.

"It was just a dream," he sighed and walked back up stairs. He layed back down in his bed, but something was in his way. He moved over and picked it up. It was cooled metal. he turned on his bed side lamp to find it was a baseball bat... a metal baseball bat with somthign carved intot he top. he put his glasses on and lookd at what hte carveing was..

There was one word on it.

_Tiffany_.

----

**AN:** how do you like them apples?? Okay, so i was watching the olympics, and that comercial kept coming on, the Mazda one. So i decided to have harry spaz out and kill the television, as i would love to do when the comercial comes on..

Okay, i knwo that the grammar/spelling is prepbably relaly messed, but i relaly dont care. I jsut wanted that out of my system. And now it is.. I jsut hope you all enjoy it as much i enjoyed taking my wrath out on the tv!!!

CB


	2. The secret box

**AN:** Okay, thank you to a few reviewers, and Lana, I'm going to add more to this lovely story. This one is for Ron!! I hope you enjoy!!!

**The Box of Secrets**

Harry had gone over to The Burrow that day. The Dursley's were more than glad to give him the boot for the last time. Ron lay in bed looking at the wall. Hermione had come too; she was staying in Ginny's room. Ron rolled over and looked down at Harry sleeping on the floor. The Ghoul in the attic wouldn't let them take out the cots that night. Harry was sleeping peacefully, hugging a metal bat in his arms.

For some odd reason, Harry wouldn't go anywhere without the bat. He said it had a special meaning. Ron shook his head and focused on other things, like Hermione and her box. The box was a magically sealed one, but it was beautiful. Harry and himself had been helping her unpack when he ran across the box.

He was instantly mesmerized, even by the thought, of that box. He tried to open it, but Hermione caught him and slapped his wrist before snatching it away. She said that the things in it were private, that letters from Krum were in it. Hermione and Krum apparently were still talking, maybe even dating! Ron felt jealousy over take him. He had to know what was in the box! He knew everyone in the house was asleep, and where the box was placed.

Ron sat up and quietly got out of bed, stepping carefully over Harry. No need to wake him, he could go on his own. He opened his door carefully, flinching at the creek it made as he closed it behind him, and tiptoed down the stairs. In a minute or so he found himself in front of Ginny's room. There was a wooden "G" on the door painted pink, though the paint was peeling. He turned the knob and heard music coming out of the room, and he instantly shut the door.

The music was by a Muggle artist who had recently become popular with young wizards and witches. Ginny was always singing the songs by that Muggle singer. She had become obsessed with Avril Lavigne. Ron shuddered at the name. She was the most annoying signer of all, especially with her songs "Sk8er Boi", and "Complicated". Because of "Sk8er Boi", Ron started to wonder what a skater boy was.

Ron summoned up with courage and opened the door. The music drifted easily through the air, and Ron pondered how they could sleep with the annoying tunes. He took a deep breath, trying to clear himself of the racket and continued towards the box. He placed his hands quietly on it and tried to pick it up. Earlier when he picked it up, it was light as a feather, but now, it didn't want to budge. He frowned. Why wouldn't it move? He tried again, putting his weight into the push, but still, no movement. Everything went quiet. He turned around thinking he was caught, but Ginny was still sound asleep along with Hermione. The song was just over.

'Thank the stars!' he thought as he turned his attention back to the box. "Complicated" came back on the radio, and he groaned. Why on earth was the song still playing? He heard some movement and ducked down to hide from immediate view. Ginny was just shifting to face the wall. Ron let out a soothing breath. The box just wouldn't move! Why not? Still crouching, he began to think. How can he get it to move so he could get in it?

"Why'd you have to go and make things so complicated?" the radio sang.

"Yeah, Hermione, why'd you have to go and make things so complicated?" he muttered, then his eyes went big in shock. The song was starting to get to him. Ron's brow crunched up in thought. He then realized how he could take out two problems at once. He would open the box, not move it! Why didn't he think of that before? But how to get it open? He knew that the box was magically sealed.

Ron though about this too, then it hit him. The bat! Ron scurried out of the room and up the stairs to his room. Harry wasn't cuddling with the bat anymore, as it was just resting on his arm. Ron bent down and carefully took the bat away from harry. He then stepped out of the room and held the bat in front of him. It had something carved at the top. Running his fingers along it, he traced out, 'Tiffany'.

"Tiffany," he whispered softly, making his way back down t he stairs and into the room. Complicated was playing still, it seemed louder. All what Ron could now see was the radio, with the words, drifting around the room. Raising the bat, he swings at them angrily, but they just dodge out of the way. The words made an arrow, pointing at the radio. He nodded and walked over to it, the bat raised high above his head. Then bringing the full force down on to the radio, snapping it in two. He began to beat the radio, even though the words had stopped coming out of it. The words that lingered in the air drifted lazily in front of him as the faded away slowly. He swung at them too, but they dodged the bat, leading him towards the box.

The Box. The thing he had come for. His vision was all black, except the box which was in white. All his attention was now focused on the box. He raised the bat once more above his head, then brought it down on the box, which crumpled. Smiling he pulled the bat away from it, but the box sprang back up into its original shape. Something began to boil up inside him, and his crystal eyes were empty. He hit the box again and again, only to have it return to its shape.

He felt something on his shoudler, he turned to see Hermione. She held her hand out for the bat but he didnt giv eit over, he jsut started hitting the box again and again. He wanted the letters. He needed the letters. He needed to know what was going on between Hermione and Krum. Finally the box did not return to its shape after hitting it. Ron smiled with glee insanity, as he opened the box. A blinding light came out of it, and then darkness.

-----

Ron woke up to find Harry still asleep.

"Just a dream," he said, but got up out of bed and headed downt he stair. He stood infront of Ginnys room. Cracking the door open the words to "Sk8er Boi" drifted out.

He headed but up to his room, and fell into his bed.Sighing, he turned over, and readjusted his head on the pillow, but ther was a hard lump in it.

'What the stars?' he thought as he moved his pillow to find a metal bat. He tranced the top of the bat to find that there was something carved into it.. 'T. I. F. F. A. N. Y.' his fingers tranced. He gasped.

"_Tiffany_," he said aloud.

-----

**AN:** Okay, theres a bit more madness to add to your list. I hope you enjoyed!!

**_A VERY special thank you to Lana (MzSirg) for helping me out with the spell check, and idea_**! ::huggles::

Please Review if you would like to be nice!! Or if you jsut enjoyed it!

CB


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